


Morning, Sunshine

by DeanRiordain



Category: Supernatural
Genre: DeanCas - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, Episode: s12e03 The Foundry, Falling In Love, M/M, POV Dean Winchester, Sad Dean, Sunshine - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-27 14:54:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8406016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeanRiordain/pseuds/DeanRiordain
Summary: My little coda to Season 12 Episode 3, where Dean calls Castiel 'sunshine'. A rare look at the inner-workings of Dean Winchester. Dean POV. <3 (Spoilers for 12.3)Again, thank you to tumblr user consulting-mutt for photo inspiration.





	

“Good morning, sunshine,” he had said.

 _Shit. Well, fuck, really._ Dean had almost slipped up.

Scratch that. Dean _had_ slipped up. The only thing that could have made it worse would have been the “I love you” he’d said the previous night to Cas, in the heat of the moment.

It wasn’t even that it wasn’t true. It was. It had been for a long time...but...Sam didn’t need to know that.

 _Sunshine_ , really?

Maybe it was because Castiel had said that Dean shined brighter than the millions of stars that the angel had spent his time counting before they met. And, well, Dean figured if he were bright as a star, then, well, Cas was the friggin’ sun.

So, ‘ _good morning, sunshine_ ’ it had been, along with ‘ _Coffee_ ’? Like they were friggin’ married or something...and _he_ was the chick.

Dean didn’t need the rude awakening of Castiel leaving to know that he was in too deep. He already knew. It had been there every time the angel had trusted him, had believed in him more than heaven, and more than his own father- God....something had definitely been there, then. What had Cas called it…? _Profound bond._

That same something was present when the glances they stole lasted a bit too long, and then, more than a bit too long. Something happened when green eyes transmitted to blue. It was as though their eyes were sharing secrets that their hearts didn’t understand, yet.

It was there in the gentle hand that had rest reassuringly on Dean’s shoulder, that had turned into a protective embrace, that had evolved into a silent, ‘I need you’, which, of course, really meant ‘I love you’.

He was in too deep when he saw Castiel everywhere when he was gone. He was in the window, the mirror, and the side of the road...and then he was in the songs, the lyrics...and somewhere, the angel had found his way into Dean Winchester’s heart, leaving a dull hole and ache when he wasn’t around to fill it.

Dean knew that ‘in too deep’ was just that, before there was ‘good morning sunshine’ and late nights sneaking past Sam into his room, where it had started out with Castiel by his bedside, then in his bed, then in...well…

“Hey…” Dean and Sam both said in unison, as Mary joined them.

Dean felt his face heat up, even as he was unable to rip himself away from the thoughts, his heart pounding.

Maybe Castiel was ‘sunshine’ because everything was so cloudy, dim and gray without the angel. Everything was repetition upon repetition of motions, hunts, and staying alive...and all it took to want to stay alive was that gruff ‘Hello, Dean’.

He felt rejection, and shame that he’d left his heart this open...things like this never ended well.

He shook the thought quickly from his head.

Time would pass...he had to remind himself harshly...and Castiel would always come back...and now, at least he had his family. In the end, things would be looking better than before. Once Lucifer was gone, they could figure this out...whatever they were- whatever their strange little family had become. But...why did everyone always have to leave to begin with? Couldn’t they just stay?

 _Next time,_ Dean vowed, picturing the scene in his head, _will be different. Next time...we can really be a family...even if I have to be the chick and make breakfast._

In his thought, Dean kissed Castiel on the forehead, handing the angel a cup of coffee exactly how he liked it- black.

_I’ll do whatever it takes...just, please, next time, stay._

 

_Ain't no sunshine when he's gone,_

_It's not warm when he's away…_

_Ain't no sunshine when he's gone,_

_And he's always gone too long,_

_….Anytime he goes away…._


End file.
